Mental health just hits different these days. Whether you’re Gen Alpha or Gen Z, you’ve got a lot more to balance than your parents did… academic pressure, social media and even just everyday worries that didn’t exist 10 or 20 years ago. One thing that can really help with that is therapy!

Therapy doesn’t have the level of stigma it used to, but it can still feel weird mentioning it to your friends beyond jokingly saying, “I’m gonna need therapy for this.” You may have even genuinely considered going to therapy at some point, but felt anxious because you don’t really know what to expect.

So, what is therapy, really? If you’re feeling uncertain about therapy, keep calm and read on while we break it down for you.

So What Actually IS Therapy?

Therapy isn’t just for your parents or teachers. It’s not just for your therapist. It’s for you, too. Therapy is for everyone!

“Therapy is a safe space for you to come as you are,” says KVC West Virginia therapist Arikah Gamble. “We can talk, we can play games. Whatever you bring to the table, your therapist will meet you where you’re at.”

Arikah describes being a therapist as being like a cheerleader for the youth who come to her. The goal is to give you someone on your team and a safe place to be yourself.

Therapy is for Everyone

Pro tip: Therapy is great for life’s hardest things. But you don’t have to have a serious mental health diagnosis, a crisis or years of intense trauma to benefit from therapy! It can help you with the everyday pressures and anxieties that most teens face too, or help you set up a landing zone during good times to fall back on during hard times.

Arikah may be a therapist, but even she goes to therapy! “It’s that safe space to vent or talk about things,” she says. “If you are having a smaller struggle and just want an outside, unbiased opinion or perspective, it can help with that.”

If you’re curious about what therapy specifically could look like for you or your child, here’s a rundown of the basics for every age. 

Therapy for Young Children (Ages 3-6)

For younger children, therapy is basically playtime! Little kids might build with Legos, play games or draw pictures with their therapist, but use these play activities to talk about emotions and family. Therapy at this age can help children learn about their emotions and work through fears about things like a new school or being away from home.

Therapy for Older Children (Ages 7-12)

As kids get a bit older, school starts to get tougher and things may not be as easy as they used to be. You might feel anxious about making friends or losing friends. Maybe you’re on social media for the first time and meeting new people that way. Or maybe things are changing in your family. Your therapist can help you talk through these big changes so they don’t feel so scary.

Therapy for Teens (Ages 13-17)

You’re on the brink of adulthood, but not quite there yet. That’s a weird mix of independence and childhood that isn’t easy to figure out. The teenage mental health struggle is so real! Whether you’re struggling with an upcoming test or having a hard time with friends, therapy is a space for you to vent, talk things through and possibly even find solutions you didn’t think were possible. As Arikah puts it, “Your therapist can give you skills that people your age or ChatGPT can’t.”

In-Person Therapy vs. “Chat, What Do I Do?”

What if you’d rather just ask ChatGPT for advice? Here’s the thing: AI tools like ChatGPT can be super helpful when you need to vent or get quick info, but it’s not the same as talking to a real therapist.

A therapist can read your body language, hear your tone and notice things you might not even realize you’re feeling. They’re trained to help you work through deep stuff safely, without judgment. And a real, live therapist can spot warning signs that AI just can’t. Think of ChatGPT as a friendly search tool, but a therapist is your teammate for real growth and healing.

Meeting with a therapist face-to-face puts the power back in your hands. You decide where to meet and what to do during your sessions, all with the understanding that your therapist has your back. Their goal is to help you thrive, not inject their own opinions into your life.

The Dangers of Self-Diagnosing

When a TikTok influencer says “You might have ADHD if . . .” and you immediately comment, “OMG, this is me!”, that can feel validating and helpful. But here’s the thing: That influencer is sharing their experiences, and doesn’t know about you and your life. A real-life therapist will know how to help identify your specific diagnosis.

Lots of mental health conditions have very similar symptoms, and even a professional diagnosis is a process of elimination. “There are so many diagnoses that have similar symptoms, where even therapists take a lot of time to diagnose something and pinpoint it,” explains Arikah.

Expectations vs. Reality: Therapy IRL

You’ve heard the basics and maybe you’re starting to get what therapy’s all about. Now, let’s talk about what it actually looks like in real life and clear up a few myths along the way.

Expectation: Therapy is lying on a couch while someone picks apart your brain
Reality: Therapy is what you make it

Therapy isn’t lying on a couch while someone quietly takes notes and asks, “And how does that make you feel?” It’s not staring at ink blots or overanalyzing your dreams. Therapy is what you make it. The space, the experience, the therapist — it’s all about what you want the experience to be like. Outpatient therapy can happen in-person or virtually, at school or at home. It doesn’t have to be in a stuffy office or clinical hospital room.

Expectation: My therapist will report back to my parents/teachers
Reality: Therapy is 99.9% confidential

Therapists aren’t spies. We’re not going to write down everything you say and then go gossip about it with your parents. Arikah emphasizes, “Everything that you say to me stays with me. When you vent about other people, I’m not gonna run and tell. That’s not what we’re here for.”

We say therapy is 99% confidential because there are three exceptions to this rule:

• If you talk about harming yourself
• If you talk about harming someone else
• Or if someone is harming you

Unless there is an imminent threat to you or others, your therapist won’t report on anything you say or share. Safe space!

Expectation: You’ll separate me from my family
Reality: Goal is to help children cope and keep families together.

This is a fear some children and parents have, but that is never the goal of therapy! Our hope is always to help children and teens cope and heal while keeping families safely together. The only time a family may be separated is if it is an unsafe environment, as mentioned above, but even then, the ultimate goal is to work toward reuniting the family.

Expectation: You’re gonna brainwash me!
Reality: Therapy doesn’t work like that

Therapy isn’t about controlling your thoughts or changing who you are. It’s about understanding what you’re feeling and finding healthy ways to cope. There’s no mind control or hypnosis involved — just conversation, support and tools that help you feel more like yourself.

When You Should Go to Therapy

There are a lot of reasons you might want to go to therapy, and there are no wrong answers! Maybe you’re struggling with anxiety, depression or another common mental disorder. Maybe school is kicking your butt or you just went through a best friend breakup. You might have someone picking on you at school or online. Whatever the reason, we’re here for you and to help you feel safe and supported!

What If I’m Nervous or Scared to Go?

It’s okay to be nervous! Even therapists get a little anxious about meeting new people, so you’re not alone in that. Your therapist will understand! Remember that all of this is what you want it to be, and we can go at your pace. If for your first couple of sessions all you want to do is draw, listen to music or play Uno, that’s okay! We can talk when you’re ready.

I Want to Go to Therapy. How Do I Start?

If you want to give this therapy thing a go, talk to your parents about your medical insurance to see what will be covered. KVC West Virginia offers free therapy services to children and teens with Medicaid. If that’s you, ask your parents or caregivers, talk to your doctor, or tell your teacher or school counselor. Your parents or a trusted adult can also fill out our online form below or by clicking here.